It's A Hard Days Night....

I'm on Day 10 of a 26 day working binge.  Not fun and it makes me a cranky bitch to boot.  No one wants to be around me.  I don't even want to be around me.  I start to closely resemble Meryl Streep in "A Devil Wears Prada", but without the fabulous clothes, chic hair or tidy office.  Instead, I'm pretty sure I'm wearing my thong backwards, I don't know when I last washed my hair and my office looks like we just survived a 7.5 earthquake.  It's tough being the H.B.C (Head Bitch in Charge) during a big case.  The minions are tiptoeing around me. I'm sure they can't wait until this is all over and I leave for my vacation on Nov 9th. I saw it written on someones calendar with a smiley face.

As you all know, I cook when I'm stressed.  The Husband came home last night to find me at the stove with every burner going at full steam.  He gave me a peck on the cheek and ran upstairs to safety.  I made this fabulous soup to calm my nerves.  It's packed with lots of healthy junk and smells divine.  I brought it for lunch today and I hope it makes everyone starving when I heat it up in the breakroom microwave.

Cannellini Bean and Squash Stew

Borrowed from "The Sonoma Diet Cookbook" 

1 Tbs extra virgin olive oil

1 chopped onion

6 cloves of garlic, grated

1 Tbs Sweet Hungarian paprika

28 oz chicken broth

3 cups 1 inch cubed butternut squash

1 14 oz can diced tomatoes, undrained

1 Tbs chopped fresh rosemary

2 14 oz cans of cannellini beans (white kidney beans)

1 Tbs chopped fresh thyme

Kosher salt

black pepper

shaved Manchego or Parmesan cheese

In a dutch oven heat oil over med heat.  Add onions and cook for 5 min or until tender

Add garlic and paprika cook for 2 min more.

Add chicken broth, squash, undrained tomatoes, and rosemary. Bring to boil then reduce heat to simmer, cover and cook for 15 min or until squash is tender

Drain and rinse beans, add beans, parsley and thyme and cook uncovered for 10 mins at low simmer

Shave cheese over individual bowls.

Gaaaaaaarlic Zuppa for me

I have a thing for soup.  As soon as the temperature hits 50, I'm at the stove.  Here is one of my favs.  Traditionally, this soup is served to young children and the elderly in Italy.  Kinda like chicken soup is our comfort food for the sick, this is the Italians version of get better quick. 

 I made this last night and it was heaven with a glass of vino and a spinach salad.     I got to enjoy the after effects on my run this morning.  Once I worked up a good sweat, I smelled like a loaf of garlic bread trotting down the street.  After a shower, I'm pretty sure I've sweated out all the remaining cloves.  This is the ultimate in comfort and surprisingly light.

Zuppa di Aglio Fresco (Fresh Garlic Soup)

(Courtesy of Food to Die For by Patrica Cornwall)

4 tablespoons olive oil
1 1/2 cups finely chopped carrots
10 cloves of garlic, peeled and smashed
4 cups homemade chicken stock, or canned chicken broth
1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme
1 bay leaf
1/4 cup dry sherry
3 extra-large egg yolks
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano
2 tablespoons chopped fresh Italian parsley
salt and freshly ground pepper
4 slices ( 1 inch thick) day-old sourdough, multi-grain, or country-style bread

In a 3 qt saucepan, heat 2 tablespoons of the olive oil; add the carrots and garlic. Cook over medium-high heat, stirring frequently, for 3 to 5 minutes, or until tender but not brown.
Stir in the chicken stock, thyme, and bay leaf. Bring the mixture to a boil over high heat. Reduce the heat to low and simmer, covered, for 30 minutes. Discard the bay leaf. in a blender or food processor, puree the soup in several batches, transferring the puree to a large bowl. Return the pureed mixture to the saucepan; stir in the sherry.
In a small bowl, whisk together the egg yolks, and the remaining 2 tablespoons oil; whisk in the Parmigiano-Reggiano until blended. Gradually whisk 1/4 cup of the soup into the yolk mixture; whisk mixture into the soup. Heat the soup over medium-low heat, stirring constantly for 8 to 10 minutes, until the soup thickens (do not boil or the soup will curdle). Stir in the parsley; season to taste with salt and freshly ground pepper. Remove the soup from the heat.
To serve the soup, place a slice of bread in each bowl, ladle the soup over the bread and serve immediately.

4 tablespoons olive oil
1 1/2 cups finely chopped carrots
10 cloves of garlic, peeled and smashed
4 cups homemade chicken stock, or canned chicken broth
1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme
1 bay leaf
1/4 cup dry sherry
3 extra-large egg yolks
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano
2 tablespoons chopped fresh Italian parsley
salt and freshly ground pepper
4 slices ( 1 inch thick) day-old sourdough, multi-grain, or country-style bread

In a 3 qt saucepan, heat 2 tablespoons of the olive oil; add the carrots and garlic. Cook over medium-high heat, stirring frequently, for 3 to 5 minutes, or until tender but not brown.
Stir in the chicken stock, thyme, and bay leaf. Bring the mixture to a boil over high heat. Reduce the heat to low and simmer, covered, for 30 minutes. Discard the bay leaf. in a blender or food processor, puree the soup in several batches, transferring the puree to a large bowl. Return the pureed mixture to the saucepan; stir in the sherry.
In a small bowl, whisk together the egg yolks, and the remaining 2 tablespoons oil; whisk in the Parmigiano-Reggiano until blended. Gradually whisk 1/4 cup of the soup into the yolk mixture; whisk mixture into the soup. Heat the soup over medium-low heat, stirring constantly for 8 to 10 minutes, until the soup thickens (do not boil or the soup will curdle). Stir in the parsley; season to taste with salt and freshly ground pepper. Remove the soup from the heat.
To serve the soup, place a slice of bread in each bowl, ladle the soup over the bread and serve immediately.

Married Woman Seeks Boyfriend

My husband is fabulous.  Truly, he is.  Nearly five years of wedded bliss – 13 years together in total if you want to be accurate.  We’re the best of friends, we spend lazy Sunday’s going for long drives to the beach while drinking fancy coffee drinks and the sex….well….he could teach a few porn stars some new tricks.  In short, we’re a great pair.  Happy as two peas in the proverbial pod.

But, as in many marriages – maybe yours too – there often blooms a need for something more.  The desire starts out innocently.  Maybe a fleeting glance at the couple seated next to you in a restaurant.  Then, the want becomes more powerful.  You feel jealously when you spy a man and woman happily shopping together.  There are certain things your husband won’t do with you.  He seems less than interested in your latest outfit or doesn’t want to try out the new sushi restaurant.  He doesn’t care about your best friend’s latest boy toy and he has no idea what happened in the last episode of the Kardashians.  He’s still home for dinner every night and the sex is great, but you need more.  More.  More as in you desire the attention of another man. A man who cares about your new pair of strappy sandals.  A man who is proud to have you on his arm as you stroll in to the new coffee shop with the sexy baristas.  A man who will watch Ice Loves Coco and coo about Spartacus.  A new man. That’s what you need.

Well, Lovers.  I need a new man.  A new boyfriend.  I need the number one accessory of the married woman:  The gay boyfriend.

Every gay man needs a straight woman in his life and every straight woman needs a gay man.  They go together like Manolos and Carrie Bradshaw, like caramel and chocolate, like sprinkles and cupcakes, like cherries and whipped cream.  My friend idol Sarah has two.  They get pedicures together, bitch about men, go shopping and cook fabulous meals; all this without the chick drama that usually befouls a normal day with your girlfriend.  The gay boyfriend never competes when you're cruising the guys…..the two of you are usually on different taste levels. And he is always available to play “What the Fuck Does She Think She’s Wearing” as you sit peacefully at the bar, drinking Merlot and eating something yummy.

So, I’m advertising for a boyfriend.  Age is of no importance.  He must be into gourmet cooking, movies and long walks on the beach.  He must be willing to dish on his hot sex life and occasionally let me film it. He must love coffee, bacon, cake and think I’m enormously clever.  And above all, he must agree that if we ever see VinDiesel walking on the street, I get first dibs.

The German Cooks Italian

As part of my new found quest for fun (AKA I-Just-Turned-35-And-Holy-Sh*t-I-Haven’t-Done-Half-The-Stuff-I-Want-To-Do), I signed myself and The Husband up for a cooking demo at the Aqua Grill in Sandwich.  On the last Wednesday of every month, Chef Gert Rausch transforms his dining room into a kitchen and invites 65 guests to sit tableside while he dazzles them with his 35 years of culinary wisdom and fabulous personality. You leave with a full belly and all the recipes to make at home.  His past demos have included, Cajun & Creole, Aphrodisiacs, South Eastern Asia Cuisine, Popular German Cuisine and How to Cook Native Sea Bass. 

This past Wednesday was Italian.  The menu was simple but intriguing:

Cicheti (appetizers)

Baked Artichokes Wrapped in Bacon

Deep Fried Mozzarella Mini Sandwiches

Arugula, Shave Parmesan & Bristol Mini Sandwichs

Pasta Corso (pasta course)

Linguini con le cozze

(Linguini with mussels)

Ravioli co aragosta e spinacia

(Lobster and spinach ravioli)

Rigatoni al Ragu di Game Gallina

(Rigatonis with Cornish game hen ragu)

Artichokes Wrapped in Bacon and Deep Fried Mozzarella
Mini Sandwiches. Amazing!

I scored an excellent seat upon arrival – right at the front, closest to the demo.  If I could, I would have sat on the demo table.  I’m that interested.  TH and I munched on the appetizers and watched while adorable Chef Gert flirted with the ladies.  Guests greeted each other like old friends.  It seemed like this was a monthly activity for most of the folks in the room.

Chef Gert with his assistant Daniel. Daniel was a hottie.

As an added bonus, Martignetti Companies had been invited to the party and was conducting a wine pairing with each course.  We were being used as guinea pigs and would be deciding on the newest wine to be added to the Aqua Grille’s already impressive wine list.  I did not mind offering up my palate for such a worthy cause!

The first course was a Linguini con le Cozze.  I was nervous.  I’d never tried mussels. 

.

Well, what can I say?  It was gorgeous!  The pasta was a perfect al denti.  The mussels were delicately cooked with a garlic anchovies, chilies, oregano and white wine.  This introduction couldn’t have been arranged better.  I did find myself wanting a bit more heat and garlic.  I don’t think it would have taken too much from the mussels and would have added a bit more zip to the dish.

The wine served with this dish was a Californian Pinot Grigio.  It was like drinking white grape juice.  Did not get my vote.

The second course was Rigatoni al Ragu di Game Gallina. This was a cold winter’s night; sitting on the couch, in front of a fire with your loved one while dressed in your pj’s tucked into a bowl.  I wanted snuggle up to TH while I dug into this dish.  It was comfort mixed with the complex and deep flavors of game hen and the nutty parmesan reggiano shaved on top.  I got the feeling most people get when they love a certain dish: I was sad when my bowl was empty.

The wine served was a William Hill Chardonnay.  It is a “restaurant only” wine.  It stood up nicely to the richness of the dish, but really didn’t have much of a finish.  I wanted more oak. (BTW…this was the overall winner of the vote)

The last dish was a Ravioli con aragosta e spinacia.   I’m not normally a huge fan of the lobster ravioli in cream sauce.  I find it too heavy and it never leaves room for dessert.  Chef Gerts ravioli was none of that.  The champagne cream sauce was light, the ravioli flavorful and the surprise garnish of warmed chopped tomatoes and parsley tied it up nicely.  There would definitely have been room for dessert.

The wine served was an Edna Valley Pinot Noir. Many in the crowd were shocked at the pairing of a red wine with a seafood dish.  But, it was explained (I already knew, thankyouverymuch), that the richness of the cream and lobster would play nicely with the spicy Pinot.  This had my vote. I lost.  But, I’m buying a bottle for myself instead.

The experience was excellent. Chef Gert put Emeril Lagasse to shame with his quick wit and sweet smile. The only downer was the group of women cackling behind us the entire time.  Poor Gert doesn’t have a bullhorn for a voice and these bitches kept taking about their marital problems and such.  Thankfully, I had a saucy gal and her mother sitting beside The Husband and me.  She didn’t think twice when she turned around and told them to shut the hell up!  I love ya, girl!  Wished I’d gotten you’re number.  We could have torn it up together.

The Aqua Grille on the canal in Sandwich.  Got there, see Gert, get some good grub and learn a thing or two. Ciao, Lovers!  

It's Freakin' Chili!!

It's cold out....finally. It feels like winter. I love soup. It makes you feel comfy, cozy and it goes so well with my favorite thing....BREAD!!

I serve this up with a side of Spanish rice, warm tortillas, sour cream and quacamole. Super tasty and super easy. Get spicy, Lovers!


Texas Brisket Beef Chili
Borrowed from Epicurious.com

Ingrediants

6 large dried ancho chiles*
6 ounces bacon, diced
1 1/4 pounds onions, chopped (about 4 cups)
1 5-pound flat-cut (also called first-cut) beef brisket, cut into 2 1/2- to 3-inch cubes
Coarse kosher salt
6 large garlic cloves, peeled
2 tablespoons chili powder
2 teaspoons cumin seeds
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 teaspoon ground coriander
1 1/2 teaspoons coarse kosher salt
1 1/2 10-ounce cans fire-roasted diced tomatoes with green chiles (1 3/4 cups)
1 12-ounce bottle Mexican beer
1 7-ounce can diced roasted green chiles
1/2 cup finely chopped fresh cilantro stems
4 cups 1 1/2- to 2-inch chunks seeded peeled butternut squash (from 3 1/2-pound squash)

Method:

Place chiles in medium bowl. Pour enough boiling water over to cover. Soak until chiles soften, at least 30 minutes and up to 4 hours.

Preheat oven to 350°F. Sauté bacon in heavy large oven-proof pot over medium-high heat until beginning to brown. Add onions. Reduce heat to medium; cover and cook until tender, about 5 minutes. Sprinkle beef all over with coarse salt and pepper. Add to pot; stir to coat. Set aside.

Drain chiles, reserving soaking liquid. Place chiles in blender. Add 1 cup soaking liquid, garlic, chili powder, cumin seeds, oregano, coriander, and 1 1/2 teaspoons coarse salt; blend to puree, adding more soaking liquid by 1/4 cupfuls if very thick. Pour puree over brisket in pot. Add tomatoes with juices, beer, green chiles, and cilantro stems. Stir to coat evenly.

Bring chili to simmer. Cover and place in oven. Cook 2 hours. Uncover and cook until beef is almost tender, about 1 hour. Add squash; stir to coat. Roast uncovered until beef and squash are tender, adding more soaking liquid if needed to keep meat covered, about 45 minutes longer. Season chili to taste with salt and pepper. Tilt pot and spoon off any fat from surface of sauce. DO AHEAD: Can be made 2 days ahead. Cool 1 hour. Chill uncovered until cold, then cover and keep chilled.

How I Enslave Men with Pasta

Food can be the deal breaker in a relationship.  If man isn't a good feeder, I'd probably kicked him to the curb.  There are obviously many other reasons to be with me: I'm good in bed, I have a beautiful bum, I'm fun, I'm good in bed, I have great taste in music, I have a snazzy personality, I'm good in bed, I have sexy hair, I have a good heart and I'm good in bed.  See, you want to marry me now too, don't you.

My one crown jewel is my Spaghetti Pie. Men just can't get enough of it.  It's slighty pathetic to fall for this dish and not something more complex.  I saw a similar recipe in a diet magazine and thought, "you know, that would be awesome if it just has some fat in it."  So, Lovers, I give you my secret.  If you're single, serve this to your next conquest.  I guarantee they'll be your love slave before the last bite.  But, don't use low fat or inferior ingredients.  It will ruin the taste of the dish.  It will also really piss me off.

Spaghetti Pie

Ingredients
1 lb fresh ground beef & sausage mixed (take sausage out of casing)
3 cups homemade marinara (or the jarred stuff - but it better be the good kind)
8 oz sour cream
1/2 c chopped green onions (green and white parts)
8 oz cream cheese, softened
5 cups hot cooked thin spaghetti
2 1/2 cups fresh shredded mozzarella cheese
Good olive oil

Method:

1. Preheat oven to 350
2. Drizzle a tablespoon of olive oil in a large skillet.  Cook meat in a large skillet over medium heat until browned, stirring to crumble. Drain well, and return meat to pan. Stir in salt, pepper, and marinara sauce. Bring to a simmer, reduce heat and simmer for 20 minutes.
3. Combine the sour cream, green onions, cream cheese and 1 cup of mozzarella cheese in a small bowl, and set aside. Place spaghetti noodles in a casserole dish and toss with a little olive oil.  Spread the sour cream mixture over spaghetti noodles. Top with meat mixture. Sprinkle with remaining cheese. Cover and bake at 350 for 35 minutes. Uncover, bake an additional 5 minutes or until cheese is bubbly. Yield 6 servings.

I Could Be Your Sleep Aid

It wasn't until a few years ago, I began having trouble sleeping.  Maybe it's the stress of the job, my age or my addiction to the Food Network combined with my inability to stop watching a show even though it's 2:30 AM and I have to get up at 6 AM.  I truly could not tell you why I'm plagued with insomnia.  I've tried everything, hot liquids, extensive masturbation, (ya know, because it's been proven after an orgasm, the release of endorphins acts as a natural tranquilizer that relaxes you) boring books - nothing works.  Yoga has been the best medicine. After a week of yoga classes, I sleep like a newborn babe....in between feedings.  I'm not into new age hooey, but that shit works for me.  But, the job hasn't allowed me the freedom to enjoy a downward dog with a side of warrior.  So, I'm back to roaming the halls until the wee hours.

The Husband could sleep thru anything.  It takes less than 15 minutes from the time his head hits the pillow until he's enjoying a peaceful REM cycle. The entire Notre Dame marching band could parade into our bedroom, play two or three songs, then parade out and he wouldn't hear a thing.  He snores like a freight train with ungreased axles and hogs 3/4 of the bed at any given hour. 

Thankfully, there are some nights I start to feel sleepy at a reasonable hour (and there's nothing on the Food Network that interests me or I've see all the reruns of Sex and The City).  The Husband is in bed with his laptop watching YouTube videos, porn, something with guitars or whatever because he's not tired.  I snuggle down into my pillow, roll over to my left side, tuck my legs up slightly and slowly start to relax.  I'm 95% there.  I've almost crested the hill to dreamland and I'm about to go thru the gates....

It is at this very moment The Husband decides he's horny and maybe we should have some sex.

Now, before you get all up in my face about I've told you how much I love sex and I like to have it anytime, any place, yada, yada, YADA - let me tell you, I was ready and willing 10-15 minutes before my head hit the pillow.  In fact, he'd had the 2-3 hours before the 10-15 minutes to decide to do the deed.  I was ready, willing and able.  Now, I'm trying to sleep.  Just because he's not tired and wants to sleep doesn't give him the right to turn me into his own personal dose of Ambien. I will tell you, that's exactly what he's doing.  He's bored of YouTube, there's nothing on TV, he needs to get up early, why not bang the wife and get those endorphins.

Well, I took one for the team.  It took me 5 minutes to fully wake up.  As always, I enjoyed it.  He's a stud, the man, all that and a bag of chips.

It's been 15 minutes since the final orgasm.  The 200 decibel snoring has begun and there is a giant, muscled, hairy leg in my area of the bed.

I'm wide awake.