Wednesday, September 14, 2011

All About Me...

I've got lots of new fans.  Welcome to my naughty little world.  So, I thought I'd give you a quick list of silly and real things about me....ya get to know me better.  If you're a regular at this site, well, it's a nice review.  It's a chance to say, "Hey, that's why I love her so much!"

1).  I'm married.  I know, it's a shame.  But, he's a stud and I'm happy.  No, I will not share.
2).  I hate chicken and I hate peanut butter.  I know it's un-American, but they're both nasty. (And not in a Rocco kinda way.  If you get that joke, you are my favorite)
3).  I bake when I'm stressed, mad or sad.  Upon entering my house, you may see piles of cookies, breads and assorted baked goods.  If that's the case, stay away from me.
4).  I love the Blue Collar Comedy channel on XM Radio.  Redneck humor is the bomb!
5).  I can hook up a computer system but my iPhone continues to confuse me.
6).  I hate my job.  Even more than the one at Satan's Workshop (old job)
7).  I have a cat named Willie.
8).  I'm obsessed with Adam Lambert because he reminds me of a guy I was in love with in 5th grade.  He was in 8th grade and everyone thought he was gay.
9).  I have an orgasm every time I walk into DSW.
10).  I have a tiny slit in the tip of my tongue that makes it look forked if I bite t real hard. No, I do not look like a snake or lizard.  You can't tell unless I show you..  No, I will not show you.
11).  I like gay porn.
12).  I collect piggy banks & antique cookbooks.
13).  I have a thing for gourmet chocolate.
14).  I don't drink alone.
15).  I own a Sybian
16).  I still have my 6th place overall gymnastics trophy from 1987.  It's in a place of honor on a shelf about my desk next to my book on "The Art of Love" (It's a first edition!)
17).  Other books on my shelves include Wiccan spell books, books on beekeeping, sex books, psych books and autobiography of Pat Benatar.  I like to shock guest with my bizarre reading habits.
18).  My favorite book is "To Kill a Mockingbird" by Harper Lee. It's on the shelf too.
19).  I cannot make a cup of coffee to save my life.
20).  While we're on the subject of coffee, I think Dunkin Donuts tastes like watered down sludge.  Gross!
21).  I get incredibly turned on watching my husband work. 
22).  I've had a beta fish for over a year and he refuses to die.  He creeps me out, but my mother gave him to me, so I've got to keep him.
23).  I'm running the Cleveland 1/2 marathon next year.
24).  I refuse to answer my phone line at work.  If you want to talk to me, leave a message. I'm busy.
25).  Corndogs should be served everywhere.  They are ambrosia to me.
26).  I've been told my best feature is my hair (followed closely by my ass and my eyes).  It's annoying when people run up to me, try to touch it and tell me how beautiful it is. - my hair, not my ass.  Although, that happens sometimes as well.
27). I have eclectic taste in music.  For example, here's a 10 song shuffle on my iPod:
       -Who's That' Girl - Madonna
       -Savin' Me - Nickleback
       -Blood, Red Sky - Judas Priest
       - Pachelbel Cannon in D - Hilary Stagg
       -I Like The Way - Bodyrockers
       -Prayer - Disturbed
       -Rolling in the Deep - Adele
       -Hell is For Children - Pat Benatar
       -Telephone - Lady Gaga
       -Crow and the Butterfly - Shinedown.
28).  I drink tea in the afternoon.  Not the Tetley crap.  I like the good stuff.  Teavana is my mecca.
29).  I have a degree in Criminal Justice, but I've never used it.
30).  I've done some nude modeling.  There is a painting of my back hanging in some guys house.  It was hanging in the Naked Oyster on Main Street, Hyannis until he purchased it.
31).  I crave 1/2 sour pickles.
32).  Calvin & Hobbes cartoons make complete sense to me.
33). I like omelets for dinner not breakfast.
34).  Big trucks are sexier than sports cars.
35).  You should always send a thank you note.
36).  My best friend Josh knows everything about me.  I've never kept a secret from him. 
37).  I sexually harass my assistant.  He loves it.  Who else can I tell about menstrual cramps, cravings and unshaved legs.  We've been together for 4 years.  He's use to me.
38).  Fall is my favorite season.
39).  I eat soup for lunch almost every day.
40).  I would love to change places with Madonna for one day.

Anything else you want to know?  Just ask.  It's not like I'd hold back.

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