If you haven't already figured it out, I am VERY open minded when it comes to sex. Even if you and I don't jive on the same perversion, I'll listen to your side, offer up my opinion but I will never hold it against you. It's none of my business if you like to suck lime jello out from in between your lover toes (true story, folks). It's what ever gets you to the Big O. I'm just happy you get there.
I recently learned that an associate of mine had a thing for golden showers. (See, didn't I tell you people come to me and blurt out their most intimate secrets. I'm not even friends with this guy). Not one to judge someone's sexual preferences, I calmly said, "Really. That's nice." and ran to Google up everything I could find on it.
For those of you that are uneducated in what I like to call "The Freaky Side of Sex I Don't Enjoy", a golden shower is basically when you pee on someone or let them pee on you. Personally, it is not on my resume. I feel that all urination should take place on the toilet or if ultimately necessary, in the woods behind a bush.
Unsatisfied with my Google search and (again) reading waaaaayyyy too much about gay sex, I asked him: "Do you like to be peed on or do you do the peeing".
After a few seconds of careful though, he said "Well, I like to do the peeing. But, if someone wanted to pee on me, I might just do it."
Not one to back down from a subject I was still trying to digest, I said, "So is it the humiliation approach? 'Cuz that's what I read about online. It's a way to degrade someone"
"No" he said. "It's just something extra. Like when you're having sex in the shower. It's not degrading, it's just fun"
It's fun to peed on someone? Hmmmmm. I'm having trouble wrapping my head around that one. I know guys like to write their names in the snow, they like to tinkle on tree trunks and find pleasure in seeing just how far and loud they can pee. I don't even think I find the general act of peeing enjoyable. In fact, I find going to the bathroom to be a inconvenience altogether. Maybe because I'm a girl. Guys can just whip it out anywhere. We ladies have to unzip, pull down, sit, pee, wipe, wipe again, stand up, pull up and zip up. Don't even get me started on wilderness peeing. That's a skill in itself.
I started thinking to myself, what would I do if a guy wanted to pee on me. Would I let him do it? I mean, it's pee. Eww. This wouldn't be a jellyfish sting situation. This would be a purpose filled pee. Eww. Then, there is the smell. Eww. Even worse if they've just eaten asparagus. Eww.
Methinks there is no room in my bag of tricks for that one. Cum on my leg? Sure. Take a whiz? You've got the wrong girl.