Only BadAss caught my faux pas on yesterdays post. It was suppose to be a list of 25 things that made me a grown up and I only listed 12. I really hope that isn't a sign of things to come. Am I really THAT old that I'm forgetful? Or, is there a slight possibility that I was posting with my head up my ass. Hmmm.
The Rest of The 25 Things That Tell Me I'm Old
13. Your car insurance payments go down and your car payments go up. When I married TH I had to add him to my car insurance. He's had a "few" speeding tickets. My insurance went up $600/year. I was not pleased.
14. You feed your dog real dog food instead of leftover McDonald's. My dog has been in the most expensive dog food since she was born. If I fed her McDonald's she would gas me outta the house.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. The only time I can sleep on the couch is if I'm totally exhausted. Right now might be a good time. Besides, we have the king of all sectionals. It is enormous and leather. I like it better than the bed.
16. You take naps. All the time. Mostly, they're involuntary. I'll wake up and the book I've been reading is on my face.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the start of one. I'm lucky if I can get Big K to go out at all. He can be such a slug. If we go for a coffee I'm happy
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 am would severely upset rather than settle your stomach. If I am up at 3 am, I'm gonna find something better than chicken wings to eat.
19. You go to the drug store for aspirin and antacids rather than condoms and pregnancy tests. ....and birth control pills, makeup, face cream, etc.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "Pretty Good Shit". Hey, my favorite bottle of Merlot is $12.00. Some of those expensive wines suck.
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time. I love breakfast. I could eat it anytime. Breakfast burritos are the perfect food.
22. "I can't drink the way I use to" replaces "I'm never gonna drink that much again". Both of those phrases apply to me. I never learn from them, though.
23. 90% of the time you spend on the phone is for real work. Sure....yeah....right....ummm....that's true.
24. You drink at home to save money at the bar. Drinking at home is the warm up before going to the bar.
25. When a friend says she's pregnant, you say "Congratulations" instead of "Oh Shit, What happened". Again...I am reminded that I have no friends. I'm pathetic.
There you go! Head removed from ass and I have finished!
There you go!
ReplyDeleteI have no friends, either... Will you be my friend?
Badass: Anytime, babe!
ReplyDeleteWell, leave it to the geek to catch on that you missed half of the list. What would we bitches do without the pimp?
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'm still only half a grown-up from that list, too.
Thanks, this makes me feel even worst than I did yesterday. Yesterday, I was about 50% old and today I'd say I'm 90%. Crap.
ReplyDeleteLike I really needed to feel any older!
ReplyDeleteLola: I know! He loves to stalk us that way!
ReplyDeleteCasey: Honey, you're as young as you feel!