Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Random Tuesday - Cleaner Than Usual

In light of my impending post on the Sybian, I will keep todays post sweaky clean. No sense in overloading, y'all. Here's to being random.

I have to answer all the incoming calls for the office. I HATE answering the phone. Fancy Pants has offered to do it for me, but that doesn't work for our clients. They get all nervous and freaked out if they think that I'm not here. (Hello, job security!) Or maybe it's because I have been told that I sound like a sex operator when I answer. I don't think I do, but everyone else has informed me that it is the case. Big K says I sound like I have a bug zapper rammed up my ass. Husbands. So supportive. So, I give our clients a woody via phone. Yeah for me. I got skills.

The staff at my gym has read my letter to Les Mills. I showed it to the crazy instructor guy and he shared the post. I was feeling a tad bit like a celebrity until I realize that they might have read more than that post. Now they know I enjoy Brazilian Waxing, vibrators and porn. Not so brilliant on my part.

We have a code here at the office if one of the Partners is in a pissy mood. I send out a blanket text message that says "Don't poke the bear today". Gotta watch out for my boys.

I am listening to one of the associates clip his fingernails over the garbage can in his office. GAG!

Do you ever wonder why you will suddenly have a horrible craving for waffle fries with cheese, bacon and sour cream at 3 PM? Yeah, me neither.

I'm copying Captain Dumbass with this next bit 'o random. But, it's a good idea and I have a freaky mix on my iPod

Here's a 10 in a row from shuffle mode:
1. Viva la Vida - Coldplay (I'm so sick of this song!)
2. Not Ready To Make Nice - Dixie Chicks
3. One Word - Kelly Osbourne - Chris Cox Remix
4. Let It Go - Brit and Alex
5. Citadel - Anna Nalick
6. La La - Ashley Simpson (I almost lied about this one. I'm embarassed to have it)
7. Addicted - Saving Abel
8. Boom Boom Boom - The Outhere Brothers (love this for the gym)
9. E Sara' A Settembre - Andrea Bocelli
10. A Secret Place - Megadeth

And speaking of copying, in light of Lola's recent brush with assholes who steal other bloggers material, I have added a little disclaimer to my set up. Take it seriously. I will find you and I will kick your ass. This is my stuff. My blood, sweat, tears, humiliation and above all - orgasmic pleasure. Hands off. Get your own vibrator stories.

Later lovers!


  1. Ashley Simpson?


    I forgive you.

  2. Love me some Megadeth. Good girl.

  3. The only time I sound like a sex operator is when I'm sick. Otherwise, I sound like a twelve year old girl.

    Haha on your gym peeps knowing your dirty little secrets.

    And what's with the comment today? I came by yesterday and said hello?!?

  4. My mother answers the phone with a sex kitten voice. Years ago my dad would have all his male friends call just to hear her say "Hulloooo".

  5. The fact that your gym reads your blog makes me giggle.