Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Random Tuesday - By The Numbers

  • 6 - The number of hours I am forced to stand at my firms booth at a convention in Boston today. My presence there is beyond ridiculous. I don't have the credentials to discuss that type of business. When I asked Partner #3 why on Gods green earth was I going to this circus, I was told that the attendees would be 90% male. My mere existence would bring them to our booth like a moth to a flame. Then, the guys would take over. It's nice to know that the Partners are willing to pimp me out for the good of the company. Partner #3 actually had the nerve to ask me how I was going to wear my hair and frowned when I told him I was planning to wear a suit that had pants. Maybe I should wear a thong and Lucite heels? Why hide the fact that they are using me as bait disguised in a business suit.
  • 3 - The number of miles I will run in my first road race this weekend for http://www.womenrunningwild.com/. This is the start to my training for the team triathlon in August.
  • 2.5 - The number of consecutive miles I can run without passing out or throwing up on myself. I've got a long way to go. I'm really out of shape for competitive running.
  • 456 - The number of gnats (little bugs) that I have eaten during my training sessions for said race. I only have time to run in the very early morning or early evening. These are the two times of day that these nasty little fuckers swarm in clouds on the side of the street. I never see the mass until I'm about to run thru it with my mouth open, gulping in air.
  • 8.5 - The number of times this weekend I tried to sneak away to spend a few minutes with my new favorite toy. We are dog sitting 2 dogs this weekend. That means there are 4 dogs in our house. They follow me around the house like a pack. If I try to have some "me time" they sit on by the edge of the bed and stare at me. If I lock them out of the room, they sit outside the door and whine. TH and I managed to grab a quickie by turning on the stereo real loud. Nothing says lovin' like doing it to Ratt.
  • 11:52 pm - The number on my computer monitor when I caught myself massaging my bare left boob while thinking of what else I should list on here. I'm hoping that this unconscious act doesn't become a habit. It's not the first time I've mindlessly felt myself up.
  • 11:56 pm - The number on my computer monitor when I caught myself doing it again. It was the right one this time.
  • 14 - The number of hours I spent building my new website before I hit the wrong button and erased the entire thing. Did I back it up, you say? Of course not! I am truly an idiot
  • 22 - The number of minutes someone spent on my site after searching "How do I make my husband wear panties?" I'm not sure you found the answer you were looking for, but I hope you had fun reading.
  • 1.75 - The number in hours of sleep that I lost last night thinking of all the things I might forget for the convention today.
That's a Tuesday wrap, lovers!


  1. You think dogs are bad try little children. It sucks and not in a good way. 2 more months until the 23 year old baby moves out. Oh yeah, I am panting.

  2. I think I flew over your house this weekend....I saw a pretty girl out back in the buff sun-bathing, while playing with the breasts. Musta been you.

    Happy RTT!

  3. I'm about to start my running regimen again. I promised my brother that I would run a half marathon with him in October. Riiiight. At least it will be taking place in west Texas where it's completely flat.

    Good luck on your race this weekend! You'll be able to run the whole thing without puking since adrenaline will be on your side. The only advice I can offer is to start out slow so you can finish strong. Of course, this advice can be used for other hobbies as well. :)

  4. You are such a hooker being pimped out like that. Hey, whatever works. And it sucks doing dirty stuff with dogs watching, you never know when a cold nose will show up on the side of the bed.

  5. 2.5 - the number of miles that you can run more than me lol

    So you've achieved whatever level of education you have to be whored out hey? Good to know that women's rights have been achieved for a good cause (sorry... i'm a little angry at men right now)

    Thats so cool that you feel up your own boob. I do that all the time :)

  6. Now you must write about how to actually get your husband to wear panties.

  7. Bet you could get a lot more traffic at your booth by absently rubbing yourself. You should arrange some type of reward system with your bosses for that, like days off or cash. If they're going to pimp you you should be getting something out of it.

  8. Heck, I kinda want to go to that convention.

  9. I'm always feeling myself up, too!

  10. I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.