Thursday, September 11, 2008

It's A Tooshie Subject, Butt.......

"It's an expression that body was designed to experience. And P.S., it's fabulous.......with the right guy and the right lubricant......" Kim Cattrall as Samantha on Sex in the City.

Anal Sex.

There I said it.

I'm sure my few disapproving readers are fanning themselves and swearing "What an evil slut" under their breath as insults fly from their fingertips and into my email/comments box. But, I figured I've gone this far. I might as well stop sticking my big toe in the water and just jump in the deep end with a big splash.

I've done it, will do it again and I like it. It's not for everyone, but it's not dirty, disgusting, sinful or shameful. It's just....well....different.

Before I get ahead of myself and start dishing advice and giving opinions, I should at least tell you about my first experience. I don't count the time that an ex-boyfriend "accidentally" went there. That was a definitely a one poke deal and not a true experience. It's something he'll never forget. I was NOT happy about it.

I will shamelessly admit my first time was in the back seat of a car, but with my now husband if that redeems me at all. We were dating in "secret" and hooking up all over Cape Cod. One day, we were hot and heavy in the back seat of his 4x4 and he asked me "Do you mind if I put it there?"

Silly, naive me. I had no idea what he was talk about and just nodded yes. I was so out of my mind with passion that I would have said yes to just about anything.

"Oh, baby-that's great-OOOOOH MY....What the hell are you doing?"

He stopped right then and said, "You have to relax. Do you want me to stop?"

I wasn't sure. But I figured what the hell, I should probably give it a try. So, I did and it hurt a little. I was too nervous and too tense. I also had my friend Josh's voice in my head "I told you! I told you! I knew you would do it some day!!!" He had made fun of me for years because as liberated I am about sex, I was totally against rear entry. It's been 9 years and he still brings it up in conversation.

Since then, I've learned that this is so much fun and there is one thing that you must remember"

YOU HAVE TO RELAX....and use lots of lube.

Think about it. What happens when you are really tense? Your muscles tighten up. Well, ladies...you have muscles back there and you don't even know it. Where do you think the term "uptight" came from?

Now....gentlemen....here is what I have to say to you. Ask before you try.

There are some ladies that are adverse to this experience and they just don't want to. That's fine. It is incredibly bad manners to assume that just because some gal is really into sex, that she wants you to gain some entry through the back door. No. No. No. Would you want her to assume that of you? Switches your mindset around, huh?

If you thinking about trying it, but there is still some hesitation there, try a little digital action. Fingers are smaller, easier to work with. If you are still uncertain, there are various toys that are designed for that particular area. You can discreetly purchase them on the internet and avoid the walk of shame out of your local adult shop. You never know, you could run into me there!

Try it, use lube, enjoy yourself. That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it!

11 comments:

  1. Just for the record, when a guy "accidentally" pokes a girl in the butt, it's referred to as "The Dolphin." Because the guy puts it in and the girl turns around in protest and screams "EH-EH-EH-EH!" like Flipper.

    Hmmm...I think the Dolphin is funnier in person when I can actually make the dolphin noise. Oh well.

    And when you're talking to my wife, can you put in a good word for me in this department? It'd be much appreciated since years of crying, begging and pleading obviously hasn't helped.

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  2. Daddy Files: You can show me your dolphin impression soon. (the noise, not the actual act) I still laughed alot, though!

    I'll give her my thoughts, but it's all up to her. I'll let her know that it's not as bad as she thinks!

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  3. Hey Diamond: Totally off topic but I had a great idea - something for you to do esp. on weekends while Big K is working. Now, keep an open mind (I know you have one)- a friend of mine did this for a year and I know she enjoyed it! What about becoming a big sister? You know, the big brother/big sister program?

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  4. Morvey: You are too cute! I belong to a few charity organizations and sit on their boards as well. With my work schedule I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to give someone the right amount of time. That is a serious commitment.

    Excellent thought, though! Thanks for looking out for me!

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  5. Hmmmm...

    What should I say about this?

    Been there, done that, like it sometimes, but you better be on your game if you expect to go there, boys. We're talking mind-blowing foreplay before you even dare. Oh, and I've got to be loaded!

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  6. Wow. I don't stop by for a few days, and this is what I come back to.

    *shakes head*

    I'm adding you to my blogroll/Google Reader list so I avoid such shock next time.

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  7. BadAss: Sorry for the shock! I really let it all hang out this week. Fridays post will be easier on you.

    Thanks for adding me. You've been on mine for awhile. You're a scream!

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  8. Lola: I can't be loaded. It's one of those things that I have to have all circuits firing. There's too much going on down there to lose control!

    Amen to mindblowing foreplay, which FYI boys, should be on the agenda 95% of the time.

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  9. These comments have made me laugh. This is a taboo subject that most women love but just don't admit it. It's a bit like kissing girls, it turns you on because you know it's wrong. Oops, am I admitting too much here?

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  10. Hey City Girl! It's an open forum here! Not admitting is a crime! As for kissing girls....I'm good for now! :)

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